direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I think a kid would responsible me up
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
