I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
