lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Randomize
