I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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