i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
We just shotgunned beers for America
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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