I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
