But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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