I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
