Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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