Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
it was like eating out sand paper
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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