we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
