I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
