It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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