friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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