they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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