I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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