I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
