NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
