i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
