Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
