I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
