it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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