fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
