Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize