He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Alive.
So much puke
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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