Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
