Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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