im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
