i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
