i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
