all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
you will always have a special place in my vag
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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