Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
