Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry awesomechick hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(941): View more from Florida

She is totally STD

(941): View more from Florida

Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD

Fav 52 1443 4421
share tweet
(503): View more from Oregon

Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.

Fav 21 5204 1550
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(510): View more from California

Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.

Fav 15 3792 1368
share tweet
(831): View more from California

I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"

Fav 9 4315 1319
share tweet
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.

Fav 3 1198 2784
share tweet
(980): View more from North Carolina

I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!

Fav 15 2338 1561
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?

Fav 3 1240 761
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....

Fav 5 498 335
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(802): View more from Vermont

Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not

Fav 0 43 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT