Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
