Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
