White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
