my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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