You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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