Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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