She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
