I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
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