therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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