how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
