How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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