i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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