I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
