No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
