My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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