bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
