i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
