There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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