I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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